I'm on the mark, getting set to go

Does anyone remember that episode of MadTV where they ran the infomercial for Cholestra?

"Cholestra. Now with 10% less anal leakage!" I had totally forgot about that even though it was one of my favorite skits ever. I saw it on the other day. So funny.


So I ran my car through the car wash yesterday, the one where they dry it by hand and there's a big mirror so you can see the side of your car as you're leaving. And uh... I didn't tip.

My conscience is eating away at me like I bitch-slapped an orphan and stole her ice-cream cone.

God is going to smote me. I has/have/had been smoten. Smat. Smoted.

Observations of the Day
7. Bowling shoes are are like... nutsacks.

142. Bowling shoe comments aside, the male body, at times, is so yummylicious that I'm completely at their mercy. And a man who is proud of his... that's hot.

Eleventy. My eyes are hazel, in my case- a gold color that sometimes looks green. But sometimes they look almost yellow, like today.

Eye Candy of the Day: The Delicious Johnny Depp

Found Object Day

Does anyone have experience with "found objects" in art?
I'm applying some of those concepts to this post.
I found representations of the things I wanted to convey:

Depth

Texture

Sexy

Juicy

Lush

Unexpected Softness

I Heart Rainn Wilson

Have you noticed that my titles rarely have anything to do with the post itself? Well anywho.

I've got to say it. I've been having thoughts of deleting this blog and 1.25 years of my posts.

Until I decide to for sure, though, I'll continue to bring brilliant and enlightened topics to the table for contemplation and introspective discussion.

Like shit I hate.

1. grits

2. liver

3. people that constantly pop their gum in between their teeth

4. people that smoke right outside the door of a business so to walk in or out you have to breathe it and smell like that all day.

5. people that change lanes with no signal

6. country music in general

7. bleach blonde hair that looks like straw

8. when people's fingers bend back behind the back of their hand when they talk (see lindsay lohan - that shit is NASTY and comes complete with big warts, I'm not kidding)

9. when commercials get way louder than the show, so when you turn it down and the show comes back on, you can't hear it

10. when nobody notices the fucking hilarious shit I write in my Observations of the Day, or when nobody reads the blog at all

11. people that are overconfident

12. people in general.


Tune in tomorrow, when Kara continues her bright optimism and overt adoration for all things. SUPER!

No Hateration or Holleration

I was listening to random music on my iPod this morning and I realized that I have some shit on there that I'm perhaps not quite proud of. Now, if I never listened to it, I wouldn't have it on there, so I have to be held accountable.

In other words, at some point I'm actually in the mood for these songs and listen to them, or they wouldn't be in my music library.

So, since I think all my readers have flown the coupe, I'm spilling it here where no one will see it.

I, indeed, own the following songs:

Honey, Mariah Carey
In Da Club, 50 Cent
All The Things She Said, t.A.T.u.
4 songs by Limp Bizkit
3 songs by Timberlake
Unbelievable, EMF
Jumpin' Jumpin', Destiny's Child
Butterfly, Crazytown
Slave 4 U and Toxic, Brit Brit Spears
Burnin' For You and (Don't Fear) The Reaper, Blue Oyster Cult
Black Cat, Janet Jackson (I actually like this one)
Scream, Michael Jackson (I like this one, too)

So there you have it. Most of those I don't ever listen to (or even like much really), but I kept them after their time had passed, so... Yeah.


Observations of the Day
A. Some people really really need to ease off the brow-plucking.
2. Not all porn is bad porn.
iii. Cher's voice sounds like she's got a throat full of peanut butter.

Eye Candy of the Day: GILF, P!nk
(Click, it gets bigger.)

Top 5: 'Bands' Edition

I'm going to have to take back my previously stated hatred for Eva Longoria. I'm a sucker for a star that grew up poor and has some humble in their personality. Besides, I have enough disgust for Nicolette Sheridan for everyone to share some. Yick.

Exhausted right now. E and I went to the courts again today for tennis. And last night I got no sleep.

Anyway, I'm going to try really hard to narrow my stuff into a "Top 5." I've been reading other people's and thinking to myself, "Self, how in the hell do they narrow it down that far? I could never do that!"

But alas, I am not one to back down from a challenge.
5. Pearl Jam
4. Crystal Method
3. Chemical Brothers
2. Beck
(insert drumroll here)
1. David Bowie

Of course, a top 5 list is difficult, because you have to decide: Do you rate them my play frequency? Number of years you've been a fan? The number of their albums you have? Because that would completely change the list.

That was tough, though. I had to leave out bands that I LOVE, like Pink Floyd, Green Day, Duran Duran, and the ever-sexy Joan Jett. But if I got stranded on an island and had to have 5 bands to listen to, it would probably be that list that I'd choose.

That said, I sometimes forget someone -and then I'll remember with an audible THWACK sound and get mad at myself for forgetting someone so awesome. I'm sure I'll remember someone after I post this.


Observations of the Day
1. Resistance Smells Like Gouda.
ii. Eye drops feel sooo good when you're tired!
C. Those really huge stretchers people put in their earlobes are fucking nasty. I don't care how cool they think they are, they look fucking STUPID.

Eye Candy of the Day: THE Johnny Depp

I'm still here.

No, I haven't dropped off the face of the earth. Not than anyone even noticed that I lagged for a while, but anyway.

I've had a bizarre week. I feel like I've been in some weird alternate reality. Up is down, left is right, chocolate is gross... you know, stuff like that.

I think what started the trend was B commenting on here and then my decision to re-establish contact with him. It was like a meeting of two worlds that I had kept separate. Anyway, that opened up a whole can of worms that I didn't see coming. Luckily he's a really great person and I didn't feel like we had to bring up old crap in order to laugh together again.

Aaaaand, as some of you know, I'm living with a guy right now, and things are um... well, it's getting more serious. It started out more like a friendly thing, but these things happen. It's morphing slowly into this.... serious thing. It's freaking me out really.

Observations of the Day
A. Warm tortilla chips are good.
ii. Sometimes your own life can look unrecognizable to you.
3. When muscles cramp really hard, they are sore the next day.

Eye Candy of the Day: Clive Owen

I'll take it.

You are Brigitte Bardot

Naurally sensual and beautiful You're an exotic beauty who turns heads everywhere You've got a look that's one of a kind

What Famous Pinup Are You?