Opening Night

Okay, who all saw War of the Worlds last night? Huh? Was it not completely and totally uncrappy?! I was so enthralled by the first half that I just kept saying to myself, "Gawd this movie is awesome." It was great to see it in a packed house, too, for a change, because everyone had the same reactions at the same time.

OOh oooh, there's this one part? where this thing comes down? and then everyone's all "OOOH" and the guy was like, "RUN!" and I was all "oh shit what was that" and then there was this huge BAM and everyone jumped. OOh ooh and then? There was this guy? and he had this gun? and he was all "let's fight 'em" and dude was like "no!"

Maaaan. It was dope, y'all. Forealsies. You simply MUST put down the bong and go see it post haste.

I sense a spanking

So yeah. Not really all that sure about this whole... online quiz thing. Some are better than others, of course. This one is, well, stunningly accurate, ifIdon'tsaysomyself. Heh. Heh Heh.
[That, for those who didn't catch it, was my impression of Quagmire.
You know... Quagmire?]
__________

You scored as Hot. You are Hot, you scream and are wild. People love doing anything sexual with you. Hot 75% Soft 63% Exciting 50% Wet 44% Sweet 44% Violent 31% Shy 31% Awkward 0% What is your sexual style? created with QuizFarm.com

Ah. Push it.

I'm pretty sure those freakish neighbors of mine are separating or some such. Remember those megafights I told you about? Well it cooled down for a spell, and I was able to sleep through the night there for a while, but then there was this apex, this climax, if you will, where the slurs were whizzing, and now I keep seeing Beenotch weaseling things out of the apartment, like she's slooowly moving her stuff out. I guess Hot Dude finally saw the light. Their cars are never here at the same time anymore. Yay!

Now, hopfully they don't do that thing they did before, where they, given the noises that annoyingly reach me, presumably have Special Olympics style makeup sex. After last time, he kept carrying the trash to the dumpsters whistling like a damn ninny. Like everyone on the planet didn't get the idea. I bean, cub od.

Anyway, on to prettier subjects. Like being ass broke. I need to stop swindling money on all those strippers, and slow down on the cocktails on all my flights to and from Vegas. Or something like that.

What?

Okay so I had this weird dream where I needed to vaccuum, but I was too busy drinking "pot water," getting high with a big group of guys, some of which I had had before. The water tasted really good, and after one sip, you were like "whoa!" and the guys were missing the toilet and it was making me angry.

Then we all got really hungry and wanted Taco Bell, so the guys ran out to get some and I used the opportunity NOT to actually vaccuum and clean the bathroom, but to sit there and stare at the floor and sides of the toilet in dismay that they really needed cleaning, and fast before the boys got back. I did that until the came in, all carrying sacks of chalupas and big pepsis.

"Let's all sit," I remember saying, thinking that the sex afterward could possibly be spectacular, but wondering who was going to clean all the bachelor-pad-style drips off the sides of the toilet. Later, I tried to go to sleep on this weird cot next to... some dude, and couldn't sleep because I knew my floors had pup hair and needed vaccuumed. Then my dog laid down on the floor next to the cot thing, and he was all pissed off and mumbling under his breath that he didn't understand what the big effing deal was about his hair being on the carpet. "So fucking sue me. Christ it's just hair," he grunted at me. I just stared at the ceiling in a panic.